Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Whatever Doesn't Kill You: A Guest Post By Gerard de Marigny

Whatever Doesn't Kill You …
Gerard de Marigny

I came from a tough neighborhood in Brooklyn, NY. I only stand 5'4" tall and I was a half-Spanish kid who grew up on an all Italian block.

We didn't have a lot of money, so I couldn't buy "Converse" sneakers or "ProKeds" sneakers … and forget about 'Puma's, they were $22 at the Army/Navy store – so I used to buy "rejects" at the supermarket for $2 and spend an evening painting the "Converse" emblem on the back of them. It didn't work – kids noticed.

While the other kids were hanging out on the corner, I was inside practicing my trumpet … and I was really smart in school.

All of those aspects of my childhood could have led to my being bullied. Many did. I learned a lot of important lessons from those experiences but the experiences themselves weren't positive ones. Some were physically painful while others were embarrassing, humiliating, and demeaning … pain of the emotional kind.

Emotional pain lasts a lot longer than physical pain and the scars lasts longer. Yet, these were the experiences that inevitably lead to my developing the most important aspects of my life – my Faith, my determination, my tenacity, my patience, my compassion, my consideration for others … and my forgiveness of others' sins - the same forgiveness that I desire from others.

How did such negative experiences lead to such positive outcomes? It has to do with how I looked at each experience. I'm the type to analyze the things that happen to me in my life. I don't look to blame others. Rather, I look for different ways that I could have reacted. I look for ways to apply my Judeo-Christian faith, for there's no better way to 'practice' your faith than to implement the principles of your faith in situations like being bullied. Ultimately, I looked for something constructive that I could take away from those experiences. I was committed to doing better the next time a situation like that would come around again … and eventually, those situations stopped happening precisely because I had adapted. I learned my lessons well.

Notice, I haven't spoken again about the reasons why I was bullied. Know why … 'cause they don't matter! The reasons why we face the situations in our lives aren't as important as how he react to them and what we learn from them!

One particular passage from the Good Book taught me the most about being bullied "…count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience."


Bullying is just another form of a trial in life. You'll face many trials in life. The trials aren't as important as how you deal with them.

Remember …whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger!

Author Bio
Gerard de Marigny has survived his youth and grown up to become healthy, happy and successful. He's learned the tough lessons that being bullied taught him and applied them to all the other trials that came his way. Gerard's debut novel, the geopolitical thriller, The Watchman of Ephraim_ is available in hardcover, paperback and all eBook formats from Amazon.com, BarnesandNoble.com, Smashwords.com, and for signed paper editions, from the Author's website, www.GerarddeMarigny.com.  

13 comments:

  1. Excellent perspective. There is wisdom in these words for those of any faith.

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  2. Thanks Matthew and you're right, it's the wisdom underlying our faith that helps us through trials like bullying.

    I invite you and all of Paul's friends here to check out a piece I just wrote about bullies of another kind - and how they murdered almost 3,000 people on 9/11, including a dear friend of mine. It's here at my website: www.GerarddeMarigny.com

    Peace,
    Gerard de Marigny

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  3. These simple and straightforward words have led me into finding inner peace. Thanks for sharing it! I know what it is to be bullied as well. Born in Brazil, lived in America for a while and now I am back at home. Just a little about me. Follow me on Twitter if you like @Dawg_Houston

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  4. VCool Dawg! Just followed you ... keep spreading the peace! g

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  5. What a great post! If only more people followed this advice. I try my best to live the same way. Cheers, Gerard, and thanks to my buddy Paul:)

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  6. Cheers to you Michele and thanks for the kind words! This is a great cause of Paul's - I'm happy to contribute to the discussion.

    Peace,
    g

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  7. This was a wonderful post, and well written. When you said the reasons didn't matter,that it was a trial, and that there will be many more trials before your race is run, is so true.

    Thank You. I was born in Ridgewood but grew up in Jamaica ,Queens.

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  8. Anthony ... that makes us Ridgewood bruthas!!! I was born and raised on Stockholm Street, between Seneca and Cypress! I also have a lot of very talented musician friends that live in Jamaica!

    Thanks for the kind words!

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  9. Great post, Gerard. You went out on a limb to tell us such personal things about yourself and this time in your life. Bullying is and was a big problem. These are the posts that I show to my children.

    Draven Ames

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  10. "These are the posts that I show my children." ... Wow ... that really hit me, Draven!

    That means more to me than I can say!

    Thank you & Blessings for you and you children!
    g
    www.GerarddeMarigny.com

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  11. Thanks to everyone for stopping in and commenting. And thanks again to G. for being here and sharing such a meaningful post.

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  12. It was a great experience Paul. Thank you for inviting me and to all of your friends here.

    I look forward to coming back next year!

    Peace all!
    g

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